friendship

PNW Life

Portland, how I have waited so long to be inside you. Not only because I will meet my traveling partner and finally see a few more brown people but me and Hilary need a break, we had a mutual agreement that she wanted to stay still and I need to not be operating heavy machinery for a few days. Before I left Eugene I noticed there was a software update on my phone, I figured I’d get it over with while I ate bacon pancakes at The Original Pancake House. After 100 years went by and it was over I couldn’t swipe my phone at all so I tried turning it off using only the top button, the only button I’ve ever used to turn it off, then I realized that you need to swipe to confirm shutting it off. Of course all the information I need is on my phone so I just started driving to Portland not knowing exactly where my hostel was. Like most of this trip the shortest distance driving days have been the most trying. As soon as I got here I went to the Apple store where the guy working shut my phone off using the top AND bottom button, somebody give this man a raise immediately. Finally I can go check in to my accommodations for the night. After circling the neighborhood multiple times I finally let Hilary be. I almost had a headache from the annoyance from my phone and parking but I loved my room and I went to a lovely grocery store and indulged in the hot food section as one should who has been traveling. I realized I really like going to grocery stores when traveling because your money goes further, it’s quicker than a restaurant, and much heartier than fast food. Clean clothes ladies and gentleman! I finally have them! I may or may not have been considering commando life but not anymore! I had intentions of taking a walk or being social in some capacity but I was beat, I talked to my friend Amy on the phone for awhile and watched Real Housewives of Dallas and I was out. The next afternoon I picked up my friend Lauren from the airport and we checked into a lovely airbnb. I know I said the airbnb I stayed at in LA was the best airbnb ever but this one in Portland you guys was the cream of the crop. Adorable as fuck, fully equipped, and right next to adorable coffee shops and little boutiques.

We went to Cannon Beach the next day where I’ve been wanting to go for years. When I saw a picture of this place years ago I couldn’t even believe it was in the US. It is so amazing, an adorable beach town with a huge rock in the sand. I don’t live for the “Goonies” movie like some people but it’s most known for that. I liked how foggy and chilly it was and there were so many sand dollars on the beach!

Later that night we had tickets to see Charles Bradley at the Crystal Ballroom. Lauren told me about him years ago when she saw him at a music festival in Atlanta. Originally we were staying at the Crystal Hotel which is conveniently right next to the venue…..that was until we realized our reservation was for 2017…..whoops! Luckily we’re in a city that accommodates a lot of travelers so we stayed at the luxurious Palms Motel instead, all I need is a comfortable bed and tea in the morning and I’m good. The Crystal Ballroom is beautiful, Lauren decided she’s getting married there, to who is TBD. Charles Bradley’s energy is immediately magnetic and so very loving. He reminds me your favorite uncle in the most non creepy way. I thoroughly enjoyed the show and was so happy Lauren gave me a rose petal from the roses Charles was giving out. On our way to Seattle the next day we went to see the second tallest waterfall in the nation, Multnomah Falls which also  has the shittiest parking, but it is free!

Finally made it to the Evergreen State, traffic was annoying of course, hostels are unpredictable of course but I am elated to be in Seattle, Washington because I love big cities and even more so when I have a good friend there! Tonight me, Lauren, and Casey, my home skillet from the first state, my home state of Delaware went to see the funniest comedy show! I was crying and choking at some parts of it which I know  usually isn’t something most people enjoy but I swear I had a great time! It was at this place called The Comedy Underground and the headliner was what’s his fucking name I forgot. After almost letting a homeless man into our hostel I’m about to get ready for bed, our room mate Katherine is from Houston and she is the loveliest, she reminds me of of of my aunts except really into astrology and she curses. Okay  866 words is so obnoxious of me GN.

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Jordan.

This post is trying for me, not because I’m lazy with severe chronic procrastination like usual but because it’s about someone who me and my Austin family held very close  to our hearts. Jordan worked with us at Homeslice Pizza for about a year and as soon as he started we thought he resembled Christian Bale in the movie Psycho, cue the serial killer jokes. I think that everyone kind of had some sort of crush on Jordan because not only was he  handsome he was really goofy and inviting. He would flirt with anyone who was near, bump and grind and body roll and tell you how beautiful you are countless number of times during a shift. He was always queuing songs on Spotify like ‘How Will I Know’ by Whitney, ‘Too Close’ from Next, ‘Losing You’ by Solange, even ‘Shoop’ from the “Waiting to Exhale” Soundtrack. His “eel” that he brought on the camping trip game we played at Thanksgiving last year…….. It was like ‘who is this boy from North Carolina and why is he so unusual? but we fucking love it’.  It was always a treat to be near him because he was always in a good mood, never an ounce of negativity which is rare. Anytime you worked with him and got cut near the same time Jordan would invite you over his house which was around the corner to hang out on the porch or to an impromptu performance by him and his roommate. Not only was Jordan good-looking and funny, he was a really talented musician, i personally think he was too modest about his talent and i really believed in him. Last Tuesday after i was waiting for the pumpkin i had just painted to dry i looked at my phone and noticed that my friend Lauren had called and texted me an hour before, i looked at the text first and it was a link to a funeral homes website in NC. As soon as it loaded i started  shaking, it was a picture of him and that sweet little generic paragraph they write in every obituary. It was so unbelievable to me and still is. I literally kept saying out loud ” i don’t believe it, i don’t believe it” over and over again in my room where i thought I’d be going to bed shortly after pumpkin painting.  I called a few of my other coworkers and friends that Jordan was close to and we met at one of the bars he used to go to. It was really fucking sad, that’s what i have to say about it in laymans. To lose someone who was so special and kind feels so wrong and i don’t like or accept negativity these days but that’s how i feel. The only solace i have is that Jordan was  already perfect, we all still have so much to learn. He always looked on the bright side and wasn’t afraid to follow his dreams. It used to annoy me whenever i heard people talking about someone who passed on say ‘ oh he was the nicest guy, always had a smile on his face’ but in this case ITS FUCKING TRUE!! Its too true actually and that’s the only way i can breathe easy about him not being with us physically anymore, he was already an angel. Its really hard to believe (here’s the part where i cry, damn you Amy for suggesting i write about this and also thank you) that he’ll never call me Nefertitties again or tell me that i look beautiful today, he’ll never swoon at me doing my shoulder dance and we’ll never sit on the swing on his front porch again talking about our bruised hearts and dreams for the future, it really sucks. I don’t fancy myself a lucky person but i hit the jackpot in meeting you, we are so fortunate at Homeslice to have you as a part of our family. This has made us all realize how much we really love each other and  to reach  out to each other as much as possible and obnoxiously express our love even more to anyone we care about. Jordan you’ve touched us all whether inappropriate or not is irrelevant and all the memories i have with you will make me smile until i die, you’ll be in my heart forever friend, i love you.

K.I.T.

Remember your very  first friend? Rose was mine, i met her when i was 4 years old in preschool. I didn’t see or think much of her after that but  10 years later we would end up going to the same high school only to maybe mumble a few words to each other, if that. That should’ve been an indication to something that i have recently learned, that keeping in touch is hard. Sure we were kids, little kids but still, even now as somewhat of an adult i am realizing just how difficult it is, not only having a genuine connection with someone but continuing to reach out and you know actually be friends. I never knew how hard it was to make new friends until i was an adult and moved away from my home town (here we go with the woe-is-me new girl to the city story, so annoying). I had lots of friends in high school and stayed close with most of them after, when you live near each other keeping in touch isn’t so hard. It wasn’t until i was in an unfamiliar place with new people did i realize how many people don’t keep in touch that you thought would and how hard and frustrating it is to try and make friends with adults. Its so easy when you’re young, a few common interests and you’re besties, as an adult not only are you jaded, you’re fucking busy! Where was i going with this? Oh yeah talk to your friends! Reach out to people! It indicates that you genuinely care, like you actually have a heart or something, its nice. One of my favorite ways of communication is  writing letters. My mom used to be in the army and when i was growing up she would always write letters to her army friends, that’s how they communicated with their families when they were away and that’s how they all kept in touch after they were out of the military. When i moved away from home my mom would always write me letters and i didn’t respond at first because i still talked to her on the phone almost everyday and i thought the idea of having a ‘pen pal’ was kind of corny, didn’t we do that in 3rd grade? BUT i asked a long time friend from my hometown who had moved to Seattle to exchange addresses and i finally realized how much i really enjoy writing (shocking) letters! Its honestly therapeutic, you get to say whatever you want with no interruptions and you get to buy pretty stationary! (I am my mothers daughter.) I was thinking about my Seattlelite friend and it blew my mind when i realized that i hadn’t seen her face in over 2 years, it didn’t seem like that much time had passed because we actually reach out to each other. I even went to visit her a few weeks ago and got to actually see where Ive been mailing all these letters to!  Distance is a motherfucker, but it doesn’t have to be. If writing long letters isn’t your thing you could mail them a funny postcard, text them that inside joke you guys used to die laughing at many moons ago, or call them! Letting someone know you are on their mind and that you genuinely care about how they are doing means so much. I know that everyone is busy but i firmly believe that you’re never too busy for something that’s important to you, remember that the next time you sign someones yearbook.